Link Love!!

This post is not a book review, just a compilation of some awesome BSC related things I have found around the interweb. Enjoy!!

The Definitive Ranking of All 131 Baby-Sitter's Club Cover Outfits

Quiz: Which Baby-sitter's Club Member are You?
(for the record, I took this quiz twice, got Kristy the first time, obviously took it again, then got Jessi. Accuracy is questionable on this one...)

BSC: Where Are They Now?
Take 1
Take 2
Take 3
Take 4
(Basically, people love to speculate on the BSC, but everyone seems to agree on Kristy...)

BSC vs. Sweet Valley High

BSC Guide to Food

What Claudia Wore

Hopefully this will tide y'all over until I can get another book review completed. :-)

Welcome Back, Stacey!, #28

Stacey's outfit on the cover is totally Cher Horowitz:

Stacey is living in New York City, but her parents have been fighting pretty much non-stop.  Her father calls her mother a "selfish spendthrift" because she dropped $400 on jewelry at one store, then spent $1568.00 at Tiffany's another day.  Hello.  My husband would be pissed at me, too.  Mrs. McGill says she shops because she is bored and says her husband is a workaholic who is never home for Stacey.  Of course, we know the details of this fight because Stacey is listening outside the front door.  Instead of going inside, Stacey runs away crying to her friend Laine's apartment (Laine lives in the Dakota, which is mentioned every single time Laine is in these books).

When Stacey returns home, her parents tell her that they have decided to get a divorce.  She then gives her parents the silent treatment for the next few days, and puts on her best "I don't care about my parents" outfit when she goes to school the next day (more on that later).  Apparently her parents called to school to warn them of the situation, so even though Stacey shows up tardy to every class, the teachers don't say anything.  She thinks about the other kids in her class that have had parents divorce recently, the "divorced kids," and wonder what type of living arrangement she will end up having with her parents.

When she returns home, her parents sit her down and give her the news: Mr McGill will be staying in New York but will be moving to a different apartment on the West Side, and Mrs. McGill wants to return to Stoneybrook.  Stacey gets to decide which of her parents with whom she will live.  She debates the merits of both locations, even makes a pro & con list for NYC and the 'Brook (basically, fabulous shopping vs. the BSC), but still can't make up her mind.

Meanwhile, Mrs. McGill and Stacey take a day trip to Stoneybrook to go house hunting, and they fall in love with a house built in the 1880s that happens to be right behind the Pike's home (remember, Jessi moved into Stacey's old house, so that's out of the picture).  After having a BSC sleepover (where Stacey paints her toes with a sparkly pink polish, then adds a green dot in middle of each toe), she decides to move back to Stoneybrook with her mom, and visit her dad every few weeks.  Laine gives Stace one of those best friend necklaces with half of a heart, and she keeps the other half, so the BFFs can stay connected. So much feels going on...

On an unrelated note, this book again talked about how thick of a Southern accent Logan has, remember he's from Louisville, KY.  Really?  Now, I'm not doubting that KY-ers (that made my inner adolescent giggle) have an accent, but I am seriously doubting that it is as Scarlett O'Hara thick as AMM keeps describing.  Basically, AMM is giving Logan the Hollywood stereotype of the Southern accent, and as a Southerner, that pisses me off a little.  There are many variations of Southern, the coastal (Savannah, Charleston), the mountain/hillbilly (found in the Appalachians, can almost sound Cajun-ish), the farmer/country boy, the redneck, plus the metropolitan forms found in Birmingham/Atlanta/Nashville.  New Orleans is its own animal, and you would need a book to break down the Texas variants.  And don't get me started on the distinct regional dialects found within each individual state, either.  We don't all sound like Forrest Gump, AMM.  Ok, rant over.

Yay!!  Fashion, fashion, fashion time!!!

What Stacey wore:  "I put on one of my better outfits - short red pants with purple suspenders over a bright yellow and black sweatshirt.  On my feet I put my purple push-down socks and a pair of red hightop sneakers.  I added jewelry - a big necklace with wooden bananas and oranges strung on it, and a dangly earrings shaped like sunglasses.  I rolled up a red scarf and tied it in my hair like a headband."  Wow.  I just...no.  She should have stuck with yellow plaid.

What Laine wore:  "Like, right now, she was wearing this amazing black pants suit.  It was made from stretchy cotton. The bottoms of the legs were cuffed, and the top was short-cropped.  She was wearing a leopard-skin leotard under her top.  Her fluffy brown hair had been permed several weeks earlier and had grown out to the perfect stage.  From her ears dangled tear drop shaped blue and green stones, and on one wrist were about twenty silver bangles."

(Ok, I know this isn't a pantsuit, but come on, it's Lisa Turtle).

And in the rare case where an outfit described in the book is actually featured on the cover, what Claudia wore: "Her hair was flowing down her back, pulled away from her face by a headband with a huge pink rose attached to it (very Carrie Bradshaw).  She was wearing a long, over-sized black-and-white sweater, skin-tight black leggings, pink-and-black socks, and black ballet slippers.  Her jewelry was new, and I could tell she made it herself.  Her necklace was a string of glazed beads that she'd probably made in her day pottery class.  And from her ears dangled an alarming number of plastic charms attached to gold hoops."

Bonus BSC outfits!!!

Kristy - jeans, sneakers, sweater, and turtleneck

Mary Anne - a new flared green dress

Dawn - a pair of jeans with zippers up the legs (I totally had a pair of those in elementary school!! Does that mean I rocked the California Casual look at TES?)

Jessie - had her leotard under her clothes (yeah, not much description here...)

Mallory - wearing a totally new outfit - a sequined sweatshirt, a short skirt, and pink leggings.

Mallory on Strike, #47

"I'm an artist and my craft is calling."  Okay, that was Ashley Wyeth, but it definitely applies to Mallory in this one. Plus, it's just an awesome quote. I'm surprised someone hasn't done an artistic rendering of it and put in on Etsy yet. By the way, I can totally see Claudia having an Etsy shop as an adult, can't you?

Now this is a story all about how Mal's life got flipped and turned upside down (and now that song will be stuck on your head all day. You're welcome).  Mallory is part of an invitation-only creative writing class at SMS with only, like, ten students. Is that realistic for middle school? Maybe high school, but sixth grade? Pfftt. Anyway, Mal's teacher announces that SMS will be hosting a Young Author's Day in four weeks, which will be a writing workshop/contest, with prizes for Best Poem (6th grade poetry, oh boy), Short Story, Mystery, Illustration of Story, and Overall Fiction, plus a famous author will come help judge to competition. This is the defining moment of Mallory's life.

Now, in chapter two, we get our typical BSC introduction, and Mallory describes herself (and the rest of the Pike family) as having chestnut brown hair and blue eyes. What? Mallory has red hair, has always had red hair, and I'm pretty sure she's always had brown eyes (most of the books talk about how she and Jessi have the same eye color). AMM needs to work on continuity, y'all. Plus, Mal talks about how she hates her nose, and that one is a first for me, too. And I'm beginning to think the bra fixation is all Mallory, because both mentions I've come across of Kristy not wearing a bra yet have come in Mal books. Are you there, God? It's me, Mallory.

Dibble alert!! When the BSC gets a rash of jobs for Saturday, Claudia mentions that it's because the local French restaurant, Chez Maurice, is having, like, coupon day or something. Then Claudia mentions that Chez Maurice has the most "dibble food." I'm pretty sure that Claudia knew nothing about French food when she had her date with Terry in California, but maybe her tastes have progressed since then.

Anyway, Mal hunkers down to write her story, but she keeps getting interrupted at home by her brothers and sisters, and even her parents, wanting her to clean up spills, make sandwiches, and mediate fights. Mal gets more and more frustrated, and starts sniping at all of her brothers and sisters.  They even start to call her Mean Old Mallory. One day, Claire and Margot even make a play called "Mean Old Mallory," and when Mallory gets home and hears about it, she goes all "NO...MORE...WIRE...HANGERRRRRSSS!!!!"

Meanwhile, she starts getting spacey at her sitting jobs as well, and realizes that she has to give up babysitting until she finishes her story. When she announces that wants to be demoted from junior officer in the BSC (what is lower than junior officer?) and even threatens to quit, she is met with a moment of stunned silence (apparently no one has ever voluntarily quit the BSC, it's like the Stoneybrook Mafia). Kristy suggests that Mallory take a two week hiatus to write before she decides to quit. Wow, a logical suggestion. And they were way more supportive than they were when Claudia need time off for art.  

Once Mallory gets home, she takes a poster board sign downstairs that says "Mallory on Strike!!" She insists that she must have peace and quiet all day to write and that she cannot be disturbed for any reason (obviously, it never occurred for her to go to the public library...). Her parents are like, "umm...ok?" and leave her alone. She finishes her story, and talks to her parents about how she feels that she gets taken advantage of because she's the oldest, and her parents apologize. Aww...

Young Author's Day rolls around, and Mallory gets to meet one of her favorite authors, Pamme Reed (I am totally confused how to pronounce that name - Pam? Pammy? Pah-may?)  Her story ends up winning Best Overall Fiction, and she decides that she can continue to write and manage to be a junior officer in the BSC as well. I love a warm, fuzzy ending.

Oh, and Mr. and Mrs. Pike decide to have a "Mallory's Special Day" to make up for using her for free childcare so much. She and Jessi get to spend the day shopping at the mall and go to a movie. This made me think about the episode of The Cosby Show when Rudy gets her period and her mom celebrates "Woman's Day" with her. Good times.

Let's get some fashion in the house!!

What Claudia wore: "Like she'll wear polka dot leggings with a short red skirt.  Then she'll wear a long-sleeved T-shirt with a black vest (covered with cool pins that she's made herself) over that. Sometimes she decides to go fifties and wears penny loafers with white anklets."

What Dawn wore: "Dawn wears whatever she wants, like three different colored T-shirts at once with lots of necklaces (plus she has two holes pierced in each ear) and a short jean skirt."  Mallory thinks Dawn is an "acute" dresser.

What Mallory wore:  "On Tuesday I wore my navy blue wool skirt and knit sweater vest with a white starched blouse and penny loafers, so I would look more studious." Sounds very Rachel Berry.

Mallory, shopping edition: "I wore a jean skirt and jacket, bright red tights, sneakers, and multi-colored earrings that Claudia had made for me."

Jessie, shopping edition: "Jessie dressed in a new purple jumpsuit with a gold turtleneck." Sounds very LSU-ish.

Claudia and the New Girl, #12

Claudia's outfit on this cover looks totally normal, so basically, very un-Claudia-like. Plus, her hair doesn't appear to be in a side ponytail, at least, just swept over to the side (I'm throwing the illustrator a bone here).  And I think that is one of the Rodowsky boys, logically should be Jackie, the accident prone one, since he is heavily featured in this one, but that kid looks way too young to be 9 year old Jackie, so must be the youngest, Archie (aren't all of the kids slowly coming back to you?)

So, this book opens with Claudia being totally bored in English class, thinking about the family life of the fly meandering through the room, when her teacher gives them a surprise spelling check (this can't be good).  Claudia writes down "farow" for pharaoh and "instatute" for institute (that's not actually that bad, all things considered). Then the door opens, and in walks the titular new girl, Ashley Wyeth (Claudia keeps forgetting her name, even refers to her as Ashford at one point. Seriously, Claud, Ashford?!?)  And Claudia is mesmorized by her fashion sense, totally rocking Woodstock-chic.  After class, Claudia asks if Ashley is related to Andrew Wyeth, the famous painter, and even though she is not, Ashley is impressed that Claudia knows who Andrew Wyeth is, and they instantly bond.

Ashley also shows up at Claudia's after school art class, and they compare portfolios. Ashford, I mean Ashley, says that she and Claudia should be friends, because she "only spends time with people of talent."  She encourages Claudia to submit a piece to the upcoming sculpture show at the new art gallery in town. Claudia is flattered that someone so talented and artistic thinks she has talent, too.  They start to spend more and more time together to prepare for the show.

However, not all is well in BSC land.  Claudia starts to eat lunch with Ashley instead of the BSC.  Worse yet, Claudia starts to miss meetings in order to spend time with Ashley and try to come up with a piece for the show.  The more meetings she misses, the more aggravated the BSC gets.  They start writing passive aggressive entries in the notebook, steal all of Claudia's junk food, short sheet her bed, and leave mean notes all over her room.  Dawn even starts referring to Claudia as a traitor.  Ok, this always bugged me a bit. I get why the BSC would get their feelings hurt if Claudia stopped spending as much time with them, but wouldn't true friends want to support her passion and let her have other interests outside of club? As much as the BSC belittles cliques at SMS, they act like a pretty big clique themselves, getting all possessive and stuff. Rant over.

Oh, at one point, Stacey makes fun of Ashley for wearing bell bottoms.  That's a bit rich, considering some of outfits both she and Claudia sport on a regular basis. Plus, I'm fairly certain that both of them wear bell bottoms/flared pants at some point in the series. But I'm sure in those instances it is "dibbly fresh."

However, Claudia starts to realize that Ashley isn't quite the friend she claims to be. She dismisses babysitting as childish and uselessness in front of the Rodowsky kids when Claudia is sitting for them, plus in front of the BSC when trying to defend Claudia's art at school. Plus, every suggestion that Claudia comes up with for the show, Ashley dismisses as not worthy. When Claudia is sitting for the Rodowsky kids again, and Ashley shows up and makes fun of them again, they get into a huge fight and Claudia realizes that Ashley only liked her for her art.  She decides to sculpt Jackie Rodowsky to spite Ashley even though Ashley thinks Claudia is "ruining her career" by that choice, but she doesn't have time to finish the sculpture before the show, and decides not to enter it.  Ashley is not too hurt, because, in her words, "I'm an artist, and my craft is calling."

Claudia gets a phone call the day of the show, and her teacher admits that she entered the sculpture as a work in progress.  At the show, where Ashley wins first prize for her sculpture of a fire hydrant (nope, not a joke), and Claudia gets an honorable mention.  The feuding artists make peace, and eventually settle down to an artistic acquaintanceship. As Cher Horowitz says, "I thought we declared peace in the Middle East."

To sum this one up, I leave you with the wise words of Lisa Turtle:

What Claudia wore: "I was wearing a very short pink cotton dress, white tights, and black ballet slippers. I had swept all of my hair way over to one side, where it was held in place with a piece of pink cloth that matched the dress. Only one ear showed, and in it I had put my big palm tree earring."

What Ashley wore:  She was wearing a very pretty pink flowered skirt that was full and so long it touched the top of her shoes, which I soon realized were not shoes but sort of hiking boots. Her blouse, loose and lacy, was embroidered with pink flowers, and both her wrists were loaded with silver bangle bracelets. Her hair, which was almost as long as Dawn's, and was dirty blonde, was pulled into a fat braid (which, I might add, was not held in place by a rubber band or anything, it just sort of trailed to an end.) But the amazing thing was that because her hair was pulled back, you could see her ears and she had three pierced earrings in each ear. They were all silver and dangly, but none matched."  Ashley is totally going to be a Coachella groupie when she gets older...

Ashley, take two:  "She was wearing a puffy white blouse, a blue-jean jacket, a long blue jean skirt, and those hiking boots again.  Beaded bracelets circled both wrists, and she'd tied a strip of faded denim around her head, like an Indian headband."

Kristy's Great Idea, #1

So I think Kristy is the one with the headband (Mary Anne was still in the pigtail wearing phase), but that would mean she is wearing a dress.  Weird.  Kristy mentions that she wears a skirt with knee socks as her standard school uniform, so I guess the tomboy phase didn't start until 8th grade.

I have a confession:  I don't believe I ever actually read this book growing up, nothing about this one triggered any memories.  Is my BSC fangirl card revoked? Let me get to the story quickly so that you can forget I ever mentioned that...

Pre-BSC time warp alert!!  Once upon a time, when time actually progressed in Stoneybrook, Kristy is sitting in her 7th grade class, just waiting for the final bell to ring for the day.  Apparently, the 'Brook is in the midst of a blistering heat wave, and the A/C is not working in SMS, making kids and teachers irritable alike.  Finally, 2:42 hits and the bell rings.  What the...?  I can understand 2:45, or 3:00, but 2:42?  So freaking random. Kristy is so excited that she yells "Hurray!!" or "Yippee!!" or something, and her teacher makes her write a 100 word essay on decorum in school.  At least she didn't get a dot.

Anyway, Kristy hurries home because it is her day to watch David Michael - she, Sam, and Charlie each watch DM one afternoon a week, then they have regular sitter the other two days.  However, that night, Mrs. Thomas discovers that the regular sitter can't make it tomorrow, plus Sam (math club), Charlie (football), and Kristy (sitting at the Newtons') are all busy.  (By the way, Sam never struck me as "mathlete," so that seemed strange...).  Mrs. Thomas frantically calls Mary Anne from next door (sitting at the Pikes') and Claudia from across the street (art class), plus a few different high school girls (cheerleading practice), to no avail.

And the heavens part, the sun shines down, angels are singing...and history is made. Kristy has, well, a great idea.  What if someone could make one call and reach a group of experienced sitters?  Brilliant!!  Kristy is bursting to talk to her BFF Mary Anne, but poor MA is not allowed to talk on the phone after school unless it is about homework  (geez, Mr. Spier, lighten up...).  So using some kind of Morse code flashlight system (their bedroom windows face each other), Kristy communicates her idea to Mary Anne, and she's all, like, "Cool."  (I totally tried to find a clip of the girls using flashlight codes to communicate in Now and Then to use here, but alas...).

After school the next day, Kristy and Mary Anne go over to Claudia's house to invite her to be in the club.  Kristy is a little nervous about asking Claud, because they have grown apart in seventh grade, ever since Claudia starting wearing a bra and crushing on boys. What is AMM's obsession with bras?  Anyway, Kristy explains the idea to Claudia, and she enthusiastically agrees and offers her bedroom as the headquarters.  Plus, she suggests asking her new friend Stacey McGill to join, too. Kristy and Mary Anne don't know Stacey well, because Claudia and Stacey eat lunch with the cool girls and boys at school.

However, Claudia takes time away from her lunch crowd one day to design the logo, and the girls agree to meet Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, 5:30-6:00.  They place an ad in the newspaper and print flyers to stuff in local mailboxes.  On their first official meeting, they get a series of several prank calls from Sam, a sitting job for David Michael that goes to Stacey, and a job for Buffy and Pinky, a pair of 3 year olds on the next street.  Sam sees Stacey at her sitting job and thinks she is a "foxy chick," and Stacey thought Sam was a "gorgeous hunk."  Oh, the days of middle school crushes....

However, Kristy's first job, for Buffy and Pinky, doesn't go as easily.  It turns out Buffy and Pinky are a pair of St. Bernards, not kids.  After that disaster, Kristy decides to start a club notebook to document their experiences.  And apparently Claudia wasn't as bad of a speller in 7th grade, because her club notebook entries only have one or two spelling mistakes each.  I guess the transition to 8th grade was a rough one... 

Meanwhile, Stacey is acting all shady, disappearing on weekends and making excuses about going to New York when she's actually in town.  Kristy even calls her house, and Mrs. McGill lies about Stacey not being home, even though Mary Anne just saw her a couple of hours ago.  Mary Anne and Kristy start to think that Stacey is anorexic because she always refuses candy and watches her diet. Kristy confronts Stacey at the next meeting, calls her and her mom liars (she is known for her bluntness), and a fight breaks out.  My favorite part of the fight:  Claudia makes fun of the way Kristy dresses because her sweater has a snowflake pattern.  Kristy retorts, "You've got sheep barrettes in your hair...you think that's adult?" Aww...snap!  Apparently, the fashion forward in the 'Brook think sheep are in right now. They eventually decide to have the first ever BSC sleepover to talk it out, where Stacey finally admits she has diabetes.  And Kristy is like, "Is that all? Whatevs..."

Oh, and subplot in this one, Kristy is a major brat to Watson, her mom's boyfriend, and refuses to sit for his children, Karen and Andrew.  She even calls him a "horrible father" at one point.  Plus, Kristy mentions that her dad left the family and moved to California and eventually got remarried, plus sends child support, but I'm pretty sure he has always been mentioned as single in the other books I have read, and kind of a deadbeat. We will see what further reading uncovers on that note. Anyway, Watson's ex-wife has an emergency and Kristy is forced to sit for Karen and Andrew, and she ends up really liking them.  At the end of the book, Watson proposes to Mrs. Thomas, and Kristy decides she's okay with that.  Aww...

Yeah, this one was hard to get through, just because you hear a recap of this story in every single BSC book that follows.

Seventh Grade Fashion Time!!

What Claudia wore: "She was wearing short, very baggy lavendar plaid overalls, a white lacy blouse, a black fedora, and red high-top sneakers without socks (eww...).  Her long black hair was carefully arranged in four braids.  There was blue stuff on her eyelids, gold stuff above her eyes, and magenta stuff on her cheeks."  Love how Kristy refers to makeup as "stuff".  Plus the makeup look is very Denise Huxtable.

Claudia, take 2:  "Claudia answered it again, this time wearing a baggy yellow-and-black-checked shirt, black pants, red jazz shoes, and a bracelet that looked like it had been made from a telephone cord.  Her earrings were dangling jointed skeletons that jumped around when she moved."

What Stacey wore:  "Stacey had on a pink sweatshirt with sequins and a large purple parrot on the front; short, tight-fitting jeans with zippers up the outsides of the legs; and pink plastic shoes."  Doesn't sound NYC sophisticated, sounds like something any 12 year old girl would wear.

Stacey, take 2:  "I remembered that she was wearing a matching top and skirt made of gray sweatshirt material with big yellow number tens all over it.  Her hair was pinned back with clips shaped like rainbows.  Little silver whistles were dangling from her ears."

Stacey's Ex-Best Friend, #51

Seriously, Laine looks 35 on this cover.  And kind of like a Real Housewife by that facial expression.  Something else I realized, Claudia has a side ponytail on almost every cover shot.  Give me a different hairstyle, illustrator.

This book opened with a snowfall, and Stacey is at home with her mom.  She then says how much she loves living in the country, that it's so much more peaceful than the city.  I got really confused, because they bought a house right behind the Pikes, so that would indicate a suburban neighborhood, not the country.  Stace then explains that she considers the 'Brook "the country" because it's not New York City.  Umm...no.  That's not how that works.

Anyway, Stacey's NY BFF Laine calls for a chat, and tells Stacey that she has winter break coming up from February 7 - February 15 (one week surrounded by two glorious weekends, in Laine's words).  Wow, those NYC prep schools give nice holidays, we got Christmas break and Spring Break, but nothing midwinter.  Laine then goes on and on about how hard it is to be rich, I mean, how she can't decide what to do over break.  Should she go in the school ski trip?  Stay in NYC and party with her high school boyfriend (more on that later)?  Or fly down to Florida to say at her family's condo on the beach.  Umm...February in the Northeast?  I'm voting condo in FL, Laine.

Stacey has the brilliant idea to invite Laine to Stoneybrook for that week, even though SMS will still be in session.  She tells Laine that she can come to BSC meetings, have a BSC party, come to SMS with her one day, and even go to the Valentine's Dance at school.  Stacey assures Laine that it will be "so distant" (another BSC slang term, I'm sad that she didn't say dibble), and Laine says "what?" (that totally made me laugh out loud).  After Stacey explains what "distant" means, Laine does what any sensible 13 year old girl would do, and says she is going to the beach. Oops, no, this is AMM's crazy universe, so of course Laine chooses to visit Stoneybrook.

So, as Stacey heads to the BSC meeting, we get our Who's Who description of each member, and Stacey mentions that Mary Anne wears reading glasses.  I'm pretty sure I have never heard these glasses mentioned before, that kind of bugs me.  Plus, Dawn is described has having straw-colored hair, but the other books I've read so far say that she has white-blonde hair.  Maybe her hair is like those old Hypercolor tshirts, and changes based on the temperature or mood or something.  While at the meeting, Kristy decides they should give a Valentine's Day party for the BSC charges, that it can be a Valentine's Masquerade and all the kids can sign their names in code on the cards.  I bet the parents in Stoneybrook love the BSC, because the parents can basically get off the hook for every holiday since they know the BSC will throw a party.

Oh, and at the meeting, Claudia indicates that she won't have time to make the invitations, and Stacey secretly thinks that's a good thing, because the invites would probably say "It's a haliday! Come celabrat Vanentins Day with the BSC!" (My spell check totally freaked out, hee hee.)  She justifies the thought because she loves Claudia and knows that she's smart, but just doesn't apply herself.  Sounds like the Stoneybrook version of "Bless her heart."

Anyway, the day of Laine's arrival comes, and Stacey is frantically trying to make her room more sophisticated, changing the posters on her wall and hiding her stuffed pig collection (Laine makes fun of the pigs every time she calls, apparently).  After the house is deemed appropriate, they go to the train station to pick up Laine.  They drive back through Stoneybrook, and Laine is all, "Where's the town?"  Stacey is all taken aback, explains that the pizza parlor and library that she just pointed out was the town.  

So, Stacey has a BSC sleepover at her house to welcome Laine to the 'Brook.  They are talking about the upcoming dance, and Jessi mentions that Quint won't be able to come to town for this dance like he did for the Winter Wonderland dance (Snowbound shout out!!), and that she's going with Curtis Shaller, a 7th grader.  And Stacey has this Deep Thought by Jack Handey: "When you're eleven, though, I guess you don't expect relationships to last very long."  I might have snorted out loud there.  As the rest of the girls discuss their dates, Laine states that 13 year old boys are too dorky to date (Mary Anne gets all huffy) and that she's dating a 15 year old named King (*cough*trust fund baby*cough).  I got kind of confused by the description of King, though - initially Laine says he has long black hair with the ends dyed purple that he wears in a ponytail, but later mentions the he uses mousse to make his hair bushy and spiky.  Sounds like an NYC mullet going on, y'all.

But that is only the beginning of Miss Snotty McSnotterson.  She goes to school with Stacey, and when Pete Black asks her to the dance, she basically laughs in his face and only agrees to go with him after she calls King (or as she calls him, "Heart"), and makes fun of Pete and the whole BSC within earshot of Stacey.   Then, at the next BSC meeting, she asks when the BSC are going to get "real jobs."  Apparently, Laine got a job as a cashier in a trendy boutique in NYC.  Seriously, AMM?  Laine is 13 years old.  Even assuming that she may be 14 by the time the summer hits, there are very strict child labor laws out there, and if I remember Alabama laws when I was a teenager, any child under 16 could only work, like, 3 hours a day or something.  You really want me to believe that, in a city the size of NYC, the best candidate for this job was a 13 year old?  Pffft.

Friday night hits, and we get all Real World: Stoneybrook - that's right, people stop being polite and start getting real.  Laine gets all snarky because Pete and Austin Bentley (Stacey's date) aren't picking them up, instead everyone is meeting at the dance.  Plus, Pete buys Laine a corsage, but drops it and it gets trampled by the crowd.  Laine just waves it off like it isn't even worth her time, and after they walk in, makes fun of the decorations, food, and band.  She dances once with Pete, then tells him she is too tired to dance.  Literally 5 seconds later, as they are walking to a table, a hot guy asks Laine to dance and she immediately agrees.  And Stacey flips a table over (not really, but that girl was pissed).  A brouhaha ensues, claws come out, weaves end up on the floor, and Laine demands to go home to NYC that night.  Stacey can't agree fast enough.

A few days later, Stacey calms down and decides to write Laine a letter about how awful she is - "You, with your words like knives and swords and weapons that you use against me...why you gotta be so mean?" (Ok, maybe that was Taylor Swift, but you get the picture).  Stacey says the she doesn't love Laine, but she always will (dang it, that's the Civil Wars...).  She also returns the BFF necklace Laine gave her when she moved back to Stoneybrook. And she signs this epic write-off: Stacey, your ex-best friend (she still dots all the i's with hearts though, so hard to take that seriously...).

Let's get some fashion here before things get too sad:

What Stacey wore (train station edition): "This is the outfit I had chosen in which to meet Laine: a purple shirtwaist top over flowered leggings, my cowboy boots (cowgirl boots? cowwoman boots?), a purple hair ornament made from shoelaces (I totally has a shoelace hairbow in elementary school.  And one made from balloons.) and long dangly silver earrings."  Stacey has a serious thing for flowered leggings.

What Stacey wore (Valentine's dance):  "I chose a red top and short jean skirt."  Pretty lame description, AMM.

What Stacey wore (BSC Valentine's Masquerade): "I was wearing red leggings, red ankle boots, a bulky red sweater, and red barrettes."  Sounds kind of like the all green elf outfit my seventh grade teacher, Mrs. Carpenter, used to wear.  Yikes.

Howard Wolowitz called; he wants his wardrobe back.

What Laine wore (train station edition):  "She was hard to miss, considering she was wearing a jean coat with a fur collar (I sincerely hoped the fur was fake), black capri pants edged with lace, very chic black ankle boots, and on her head, a brilliant oversized red beret."

What Laine wore (Valentine's dance):  "She had on a black leotard, long black jacket, black leggings over black stockings (What!?!  Why, just...why?), and black shoes.  Her jewelry was silver though. And big."

"You Are All Sheep!!", or Dawn Saves the Planet, #57

"Do you think kids can save the planet?"  Sure, if they are not obnoxious asshats like Dawn is in this book.  Seriously, Dawn really annoyed me in this one, normally only Kristy gets on my nerves as much.  But I get ahead of myself...

The book opens with Dawn in her science class, and they are beginning the study of ecology.  Dawn's somewhat hippie teacher Mrs. Gonzalez (sorry, AMM described the teacher as having a long braid down her back, and I'm just thinking hippie.  Roll with me, people) asks the above question, and Dawn gets super pumped and excited, raising her hand with every environmental question, practically singing out the answers.  Alan Gray makes fun of her in class, which makes me like Alan Gray just a little bit.

Anyway, Mrs. Gonzalez assigns everyone the task of coming up with a project on ecology. Dawn can't figure out what she should do until she is babysitting the Barrett kids and starts teaching them about recycling.  At one point, she picks up the plastic rings that hold a six pack of Cokes together and lectures the kids about how these need to cut up to save the dolphins and tuna and stuff.  And I get an instant flashback to Can't Hardly Wait.





Sara Rue is awesomesauce.  Anyway, Dawn figures out that she should lead an afterschool class for the BSC charges about how to save the planet.  And since Stacey also has Mrs. Gonzalez for science (a different period, though), they decide to team up and teach the class together, focusing on subjects like recycling, water conservation, saving energy, yada, yada, yada.  They end up having 13 kids "sign up" for the class, and then the Green Machine sweeps through the kids of the 'Brook.

The Pike kids decide to form the "Green Police" (sounds vaguely SS-ish from WWII) and lecture Mallory and Jessie every time they use a paper towel instead of a dish cloth/cloth napkins, or if they try to serve lunch on paper plates instead of real dishes (they do realize that running the dishwasher/washing machine uses energy and water, right?).  Every time Mallory and Jessie have an infraction, they have to go to Green School.  Most of the other kids in Stoneybrook get equally annoying, I mean socially active, as well.

Meanwhile, Dawn realizes that there is no centralized recycling center and Stoneybrook, and starts a campaign to have one started as SMS.  However, her version of "campaigning" is to lecture every single kid in school about recycling, even yelling at them if they throw an aluminum can in the trash.  She even lectures between calls at the BSC meetings, and yells at Claudia for buying individually wrapped candies (umm...I don't want your hands touching my Hershey Kisses, back off, wench!!).  Seriously, I can totally see Dawn growing up to be one of those PETA protesters at Fashion Week who throw red paint at people who wear fur coats.  "MURDER!!  FUR! IS! MURDER!!"

Continuity alert!!  Dawn is horrified when Styrofoam fast food containers fall out of the locker next to her, owned by the popular Shawna Riverson (the cheater from Claudia and the Middle School Mystery returns!!) Anyway, Dawn asks Shawna Riverson if she cares about saving the planet, and Shawna is all, "No" and rolls her eyes. And now I like Shawna a little bit, too.  (For the record, I do recycle, I just can't stand obnoxiousness.)

The recycling center is approved, but after Dawn has alienated the entire student body, no one votes for her to chair the recycling committee.  Mrs. Gonzalez gets chosen instead (why would it make sense to even have a 13 year old girl on the ballot for such a position?  I mean, really).  Dawn sulks at the Grand Opening ceremony when no one publicly recognizes her efforts, but the BSC end up calling her out at the next meeting for being a total jerk.  Even Mary Anne is mad at Dawn, and that's saying something.  Dawn realizes the error of her ways, and apologizes to everyone. 

At the end of the project, the BSC charges throw a "Green Fair" to show everyone how much they have learned about saving the planet.  The sell reusable canvas shopping bags, bird feeders made out of milk cartons, and so on.  Mrs. Gonzalez attends the fair, and ends up giving Dawn and Stacey an A on the project.  Plus, she invites Dawn to be the student co-chair of the recycling center.  Yay.

Oh, and something completely random thrown into this book: two 8th grade boys decide to protest the awful school lunches by bringing Brie cheese, pate (ok, I couldn't figure how to get the accent mark over the "e" in pate, sorry), and sparkling cider, and eat all of this on china and a cloth tablecloth.  Umm...really?  I'm sorry, do most 13 year old boys even know what those foods are?  Wouldn't they get picked on something fierce for having the equivalent of a candelit, romantic dinner together?  Plus, don't you get suspended for bringing your own silverware to school these days?

Fashion show time!!

What Stacey wore:  "Today she was wearing floral leggings, a pink shirt with big sleeves, and a long vest covered in antique pins.  A black fedora with a red cloth rose was perched on top of her shoulder length hair."  Very Pretty in Pink.

Jessi and the Superbrat, #27

This was another large print library book.  What really makes me feel old is that I kept thinking how much easier this was to read.  Sigh...

This book opens with Jessi thinking how much she misses her family in Oakley, NJ, especially her cousin and BFF, Keisha.  I totally didn't remember that she was from NJ, and I don't remember Keisha being mentioned in other books.  I didn't read that many Jessi books as a kid, so that's probably why.  I guess I'm allowed to forget some details over the past 20 years, too.  And why does Jessi look about 30 on the cover?  She's supposed to be 11, one year older than the Pike triplets, also on the cover, and she looks older than I do.  

Let's get some plot in here:  Jessi finds out that her favorite character on the TV show P.S. 162 is actually from the 'Brook, and used to attend SES.  His name is Derek Masters, and now that his show is on hiatus, his family is returning to Stoneybrook.  Mayhem ensues.  Anyway, next BSC meeting, Mrs. Masters calls for a sitter for Derek and his brother, Todd, and Jessi gets the job.  She is super excited, but the more she asks Derek about the show, the more he changes the subject.  Jessi invites some of the other BSC charges over to play with Derek, the same things happen - the kids want to talk about Hollywood, Derek just wants to be a normal kid.  When Derek returns to school, he talks about being bullied by this kid named John, who the BSC promptly dubs "the Superbrat."

Meanwhile, in ballet land, Madame Noelle, Jessi's dance teacher, announces that the Stoneybrook Civic Center is holding auditions for Swan Lake, and encourages Jessi to audition.  Jessi needs a resume and photo for the audition, and after talking with Derek about headshots, she decides that she may need to get into modeling around Stoneybrook.  Plus, after she gets to the first round of auditions for the ballet, where there are professional dancers from New York also auditioning (umm...is the 'Brook that big of a cultural mecca, that professional dancers would come audition for a production here?), she thinks that she may drop ballet altogether and do acting as well.  However, Jessi gets called back for a second audition, and then a third...and then gets a part as a swan maiden.  And promptly decides that ballet is her true calling.

And things settle down for Derek Masters at school, he even makes several friends again. However, he gets cast in a TV movie (I really hope it's a Lifetime movie.  Or maybe Syfy.) and the Masters family must return to LA.  The BSC decides to through a going-away breakfast party for Derek (cause apparently 9am on a Saturday was the only time they were all free...), and they decide to invite the Superbrat so that they can help Derek confront him.  However, no one named John shows up to the party, and all the kids at the party were nice to Derek.  Then, Derek pulls Jessi aside and confesses that he was actually the Superbrat, because he didn't know how to be a normal kid at school at first and wanted the other kids to like him.  Yeah, cause dumping someone's lunch over their heads is a great way to make friends.  Well, if you are a child actor, maybe.  True Hollywood Story:  How Derek Masters Spiraled Out of Control in his Hometown.

What Claudia wore:  "That Monday, for instance, she had two french braids pulled back and wound into one.  She's also a wild dresser.  At that meeting, she was wearing a bright pink T-shirt, a short red flouncy skirt, and underneath the skirt she had on black footless tights that she had rolled up to mid-calf."

I think Emma Stone is a fan of BSC fashion, too...

Poor Mallory!, #39

Mallory totally has on tight rolled jeans, white slouchy socks, and Keds on the cover shot.  I think she has been raiding my fifth grade closet.

So, Mallory comes home from school to find out that her dad's law firm is downsizing, and her mother is afraid that Mr. Pike won't have enough seniority to keep his job.  However, pink slips have been flying all day, and Mr. Pike still hasn't received one.  So, Mal goes off to the BSC meeting with hopes high.

Oh, and as she goes off to the BSC meeting, we get our typical description/introduction to each BSC member, and for the first time since this project has started, I came across Kristy's "bio" where is mentions that she doesn't even wear a bra yet.  I remember how often AMM would use this to describe Kristy in her books (I'm somewhat shocked that it took this many books into my project to come across the reference), and it always bothered me.  It's not that it's necessarily inappropriate, I guess, and maybe AMM wanted to reassure her readers that every girl matures differently, but I just never liked reading how Kristy didn't wear a bra yet.  Maybe it offends my delicate Southern sense of propriety.  Who knows.  

Anyway, once Mallory returns home, she finds out her dad received a pink slip at the end of the day (Mallory thought that was really "stale" of his company. OMG.)  So, Mrs. Pike signs up for a temp agency while Mr. Pike job hunts.  After several weeks of looking with no results, Mr. Pike gets depressed and watches soap operas in his sweats.  And this is the mental picture I have of the Pike household:

And if you don't recognize that movie, then I feel sorry for you for not being a kid of the 80s.  

The Pike kids from the "Pike Club" to help think of ways to save money (turning off electronics and such), plus ways to earn money as well.  The triplets, Adam, Byron, and Jordan, do odd jobs like mowing and dog walking, Nicky gets a paper route, the girls have a lemonade stand. Mallory, meanwhile, gets a month-long sitting job, on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, for one of the rich families in Kristy's neighborhood.  

Plus, all the Pike kids share that they are being bullied in school because their father lost his job.  Some of the 6th grade mean girls spread gossip that he was caught stealing, and some of Mal's school friends believe that.  I was a little skeptical, at first, that kids would care this much about adult jobs that they would bully other kids over something like this.  But then I remembered what middle school was like, and kids can be mean for the stupidest reason, so I can see this actually happening.  Good lesson, AMM.

While all this is going on, Mallory is babysitting the Delaney kids, who are so rich that they have a golden fountain in their house, 2 tennis courts, and a Persian cat that costs $400 (all I can think of is Mariah Carey doing the Stairmaster in her high heels on MTV Cribs).  Plus, they have a new pool that all the neighborhood kids want to use.  After a while, Amanda and Max Delaney realize that some kids are using them for their pool.  Mallory saves the day and helps them find out who their real friends are, and she realizes that rich kids have problems too.  Mo' money, mo' problems.

Then Mr. Pike gets an interview, then a second interview, then a third interview (this seemed like a lot when I was a kid, but now that I'm adult who has been through the hiring process a few times, I know what that feels like.)  Finally, good news, he got the job!!  Mrs. Pike decides she will keep temping a few days a week just to keep her sanity with 8 kids (ok, AMM didn't specify the reason, but come on, the woman has 8 kids, she needs to get out of the house some.)

To celebrate, Mallory hosts a BSC sleepover at her house, where they prank call the girls who bullied Mallory.  Oh, I miss the days of prank calling...


Return of the word "dibble" (slang for incredible, apparently):

 -  the most dibble family
 -  dibbly sophisticated
 -  height of dibble-dom
 -  Queen of Dibbleness
 -  dibbly strict
 -  dibbly great
 -  dibbly disgusting
 -  dibbly happy

Final "dibble" count - 8.  Did she actually make "fetch" happen here?  Oh, and spell-check is fine with the word "dibble," but doesn't like any iterations of the word.  That's dibbly uncool.

Claudia didn't get an actual outfit description in this one, just a general style statement: "Claudia wears wild clothes like big hats; flowered vests over long shirts that belong to her father and which she leaves untucked; short black pants; and then, something just a little offbeat like penny loafers from the 1950s with white bobby socks."  Also, her jewelry is "the height of dibble-dom, she might wear a monkey in one ear and a banana in the other."  I'm telling you, she and Clarissa Darling are style sisters.

Mary Anne and the Haunted Bookstore - Mystery #34

I found out in this book that apparently the BSC keeps a separate "mystery notebook," which is completely separate from the regular club notebook.  Given that this is mystery #34, I guess the mystery notebook is justified.

It was a dark and stormy season in the 'Brook (apparently it has been raining for several weeks now).  Mary Anne has a school project on Edgar Allan Poe, so of course the bookshop she ends up working in is called Poe and Co.  Mary Anne gets a job sitting for the two children of the owner, Mr Cates, while they prepare to open Stoneybrook's new mystery bookstore.  Of course, she and the rest of the BSC (this falls during the Abby years) also end up helping paint the bookstore and doing inventory.  Cause that makes total sense.  Child labor laws, what?

So the bookstore is opening in the historic home of Benson Dalton Gable, Stoneybrook's own mystery writer and contemporary of Poe's.  In fact, the rumor around the 'Brook is that Poe stole his ideas from Gable, then murdered Gable to keep the secret.  Gable's body has never been found.

So, right away, objects go mysteriously missing, strange things go bump in the night, and Poe coincidences abound.  Then one of the workers sees a ghost in the basement, right before a mystery concrete slab is unearthed in the basement, that eerily resembles a tombstone.   M-A has a feeling that someone is behind these shenanigans, but who can it be?

STOP!!  Collaborate and listen as I give you a breakdown of every Poe reference AMM throws at us:

"The Tell-Tale Heart" - Mary Anne hears the sound of a heartbeat coming from the walls of the bookstore

"The Fall of the House of Usher" - M-A thinks the windows of the Gable house have the "vacant, eye-like" look of the House of Usher

"The Purloined Letter" - some sketches of bookshelves go missing, then turn up on a bookshelf in plain sight

"The Black Cat" - the owner's black cat is named Pluto after this story, the Pluto gets walled up after new drywall is installed, similar to the cat in the Poe story

"Annabel Lee" - we find out the owner's ex-wife's name is Annabel Lee, like the poem

And, of course, "The Raven" - the word "Nevermore" is found carved on an old bookshelf, then a raven flies through the main room, which the owner catches and names "Lenore"


Suspects:

Mr. Cates - the owner of the bookstore, possibly trying to drum up publicity before the grand opening?

Cillia Spark - Mr. Cates assistant, who also enjoys the mystery and publicity, and who used to work in special effects in Hollywood?

Tom & Gillian Cates - the kids of the owner, whose mother abandoned them and who can't stand Ms. Spark?

Professor Kingsolver - the English professor from Stoneybrook University who wants to prove that Poe and Gable were all buddy-buddy?

Alex Gable - the last teenage descendant of Benson Dalton Gable, trying to prove that Poe stole his ancestor's stories?

Benson Dalton Gable - could his ghost be haunting the location, doomed to search for revenge for all eternity?

Drumroll, please....

Mary Anne channels Poe's famous Detective Dupin, and figures out it was Mr. Cates behind the disturbances, trying to guarantee the bookstore will be a success.  The heartbeat sound came from a stereo system hooked up in the basement, the stone slab and ghost were props from Cillia Spark's movie days.  Plus, the raven was purchased at a local pet store.  All the news stories make the bookstore a huge success, and the BSC is invited to the grand opening party.  Good times.

Oh, and I love a good "crazy cat lady" moment - Mary Anne is thirsty, but won't get up to get a drink because Tigger is asleep on her lap.  Umm...I must confess that I make decisions on a daily basis based on where my cats may be sleeping at the moment.  That hits a little too close to home, AMM.

And today in BSC fashion....


What Claudia wore: "Today she had on a pair of jeans, but they weren't like anyone else's jeans.  She'd painted raindrops down each leg.  Over the jeans she wore a long white shirt and a gray vest.  For earrings she was wearing paper parasols attached to gold chains."  That's almost normal.  Wow.

What Stacey wore:  "Today she'd painted her nails navy blue to match her outfit. She wore a navy blue miniskirt and a white ribbed turtleneck with matching white ribbed stockings. Although it sounds plain, nothing looks plain on Stacey.  Around her neck she wore a thick gold chain that hung about halfway down her sweater."  This outfit is giving me a Blair Waldorf vibe.

Stacey, take 2:  "Stacey pulled out her white plastic sunglasses with turquoise polka dots out of her pocket and put them on.  They matched her turquoise sundress - which was covered by a denim jacket."