Kristy and the Vampires, Mystery #15

Twilight comes to the 'Brook, y'all. By the way, Kristy's shirt on the cover bugs the crap out of me, it has the name of the movie, Little Vampires, but it has it in quotation marks. Really?!? Come on, random cover artist dude, you don't put the name of a movie, band, book, etc. in quotation marks on a t-shirt, that's just crazy talk talkin'.

So, Derek Masters is back in Stoneybrook for the summer, and this time, he is bringing Hollywood with him. That's right, Derek is filming a TV movie, called Little Vampires (sounds like a Twilight prequel, which would air on ABC Family), right in Stoneybrook. Mrs. Masters calls the BSC needing a set sitter for Derek for the duration of the movie, and Kristy gets the job. Plus, Claudia will watch Derek's little brother, Todd, a few days a week when Mrs. Masters needs to be on set. My question is what movie studio would be happy with a 13 year old girl being the only chaperone at times for 8 year old Derek. Something tells me that some kind of SAG code would require that any chaperone be over the age of 18. But, whatevs, AMM, we'll roll with it, like always. 

So, the first day of production rolls around, and Kristy just strolls onto set to meet Derek (because that makes total sense. Why would she need some type of access badge or an escort to show her where to go? Nope, we just let any 13 year old girl stroll onto a movie set at any time...). Anyway , Kristy is surprised when she sees Derek, apparently the boy finally hit puberty and has grown 4 inches (no word is his voice is cracking or not. That would have been a fun detail to provide, AMM). Plus, Derek has grown super clumsy, breaking a Tiffany lamp in the prop department on his first day, which highly aggravates the prop master. However, things start happening on set which can't be attributed to Derek's clumsiness - Todd Masters accidentally breaks a special prop window through which Derek was supposed to fall; however, it turns out that the window had real glass instead of the special breakaway glass that is used for stunts. If Derek had fallen through that, he would have been seriously injured. Furthermore, the wires on Derek's stunt harness break, but since Derek had already been replaced by a stuntwoman due to the window incident, he wasn't hurt, and the stuntwoman only suffered minor bruising. After Kristy finds a menacing note threatening Derek in his trailer, she calls, you guessed it, an emergency meeting.

Here is the list of suspects compiled by the BSC:

Carson Fraser - the star of Little Vampires (he plays Laddie Adulcar, an anagram of Dracula - I see what you did there, AMM). Carson is famous for starring on the television show "Miami Beach, USA" (I'm picturing David Charvet from "Baywatch"). He starts to get jealous when Derek starts to oushine him in the acting department.

Frank Bottoms - Carson's manager, who is getting frustrated that Derek is getting way more press than Carson due to all the accidents on set.

Sheila Mayberry - the movie's publicist, who gets more and more excited with each mishap, because that means more publicity, and all publicity is good publicity when it comes to movies.

Zeke Hill - the movie's prop master, who was fired after the incident with the prop window

Cliff Chase - the producer of Little Vampires, who wants his movie to succeed at all costs

Lindsey Rockaway - the crazy stalker fan of Carson Fraser's, who is on set every single day to catch a glimpse of her object of devotion

Meanwhile, while the BSC investigates, they all continue to sit for neighborhood kids, and they all randomly bring these kids to set to watch filming. Yeah, I'm sure the producers love having random local kids just hanging around, making noise and causing mayhem. Claire Pike is terrified of the "vampires," but Mary Anne solves this by having Clair dress up like a witch to scare the vampires away (see cover image for visual). Mallory does get chosen one day to be an extra in a scene, which gives her a boost of confidence (I guess this director didn't have a problem with her look like the last one). In addition to all of this, Cokie Mason starts hanging around, hoping to meet Carson Fraser as well. She invites all of the cast and crew to a pool party at her house, but the only people that show up are some of the camera guys, Kristy, Claudia, and Derek. Kristy feels sorry for Cokie, until the next day when everyone who went to the party ends up with food poisoning, at which time Special K is back to thinking Cokie is a bee-yotch from Hades.

Back on set, Derek continues to get notes, and Kristy somehow talks one of the production assistants into letting her look over the film's purchasing orders (I just...can't. Seriously, AMM?). She finds out that the window was ordered from Rockaway Glass (or something like that, didn't write down the company name, because I'm lazy). She sees Lindsey, the pyscho stalker, hanging around Derek's limo, covered in some type of oily fluid. Kristy somehow deduces that the brake lines have been cut (again, just no words), and stops the driver from leaving the set with Derek. She also chases down and catches Lindsey, who admits to doing everything out of love for Carson. And instead of being arrested, AMM does this PSA-type happy ending where Lindsey enters some type of mental institution for intensive therapy (if you can call that a happy ending, anyway). The production moves out to LA to finish filming, where Dawn, who is on one of her Cali extended stays, takes over duties as Derek's set sitter.

And the movie about vampires is a huge success. Maybe Hollywood should jump on the vampire bandwagon already...cause we haven't had a vampire fix in a long time...


Forks Fashion!!

What Claudia Wore (party edition): "Claudia was looking great in a loose, flowery jumpsuit."

What Cokie Wore (movie set edition): "Cokie was wearing a white, ruffly peasant blouse that was pulled off her shoulders and a pink flowered skirt with white high-heeled sandals."

What Cokie Wore (party edition): "Well, Cokie was wearing a tight mini-dress (pink, of course), pink heels, and nail polish and lipstick to match." Sounds like a Barbie doll, right?